Saturday, July 21, 2012

My Fear and Worry

Key Verses:

"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear...Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them.  Are you not much more valuable than they?  Who of you, by worrying, can add a single hour to his life?"  Matthew 6:25-27

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God." Philippians 4:6

"For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love, and of self-discipline."  2 Timothy 1:7

Josh and I have prayed for Nora-Kate since before she was conceived.  After she was conceived, as she grew in my womb, we continued to lay hands on her and pray for her.  We also, in the privacy of our own home, dedicated her to the Lord long before she was born and long before she was publicly dedicated in front of family and friends at church.  We have never seen her as ours, but as God's.  She is God's child whom He has entrusted to us for a short amount of time.  When I say we dedicated her to God, I mean that Josh and I prayed that God's will would be done in her life and that, ultimately, she belongs to Him.  We continue to pray for Nora-Kate and always will as long as we are able--we pray for her physical life, her spiritual life, her salvation, and anything else that is on our hearts.

We know that our faithfulness in prayer will bring spiritual attacks because dependency on God does not please Satan in any way.  Satan will do whatever he can to hinder our faith.  Well, that is what he has done recently in my life.  For the last month or so, I have struggled with worry regarding Nora-Kate.  Over the last few weeks, we have gone on some small vacations and had several painters and electricians in our house finishing up some renovations, which I allowed to get in the way of my daily devotions with God.  I was just so tired from packing, unpacking, child care, clean up, house renovations, and driving to and from Augusta that I would just rest whenever I got a free moment instead of getting in the Word.  Well, Satan took that opportunity (a seemingly small window) and began speaking lies into my life and I started to believe them because I had not been in the Word like I needed to be.  Consequently, I started worrying about Nora-Kate's life, physical and spiritual.

I obtained spiritual counsel from a couple of very wise, God-fearing women who steered me straight to the Word.  They gave me a few Scripture references, but unfortunately the Bible does not give specific details about what will happen to our children at the Rapture when Jesus returns.  After offering me some places to explore in the Bible, both women told me it was something I had to work out on my own with God, something I had to pray about and seek God's peace on the subject.  So, I did.  I read the references I was given, then the Holy Spirit led me to the gospels of Matthew, Mark, and Luke.  As I was reading through them, an overwhelming sense of peace came over me and I heard God whisper, "Trust Me."  

To that end, when we are afraid of something or someone, our fear says we don't trust that person or thing.  We don't think that he/she/it has any regard for our best interest and some harm could come to us through that person or thing.  For example, if I fear rollercoasters, then I can translate that to mean that I don't trust the rollercoaster.  I don't trust it to make me feel good or keep me safe.  If I fear or worry about the actions of a particular person (it could be a boss, a neighbor, an enemy), then that translates to mean that I don't believe that person has my best interest at heart and he/she could fire me, injure me, or make my life miserable.  Similarly, God has taught me that when I worry or fear, I am saying that I don't trust Him.  I don't trust His plan, His character, or His will, which was very convicting for me to hear.  It is very difficult at times and it takes me lifting up prayers almost 24/7 and going back to the Word as much as I need to fight fear and worry, but it is possible to do.  We just have to trust God--we have to move our flesh out of the way and believe what we know is true.  If we believe He is Who He says He is and He does what He says He does, then that's all we need to know.  We don't have to know all the answers because we know in Whom we are trusting--that's faith.  "And without faith, it is impossible to please God"~Hebrews 11:6.

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